Worst Movie Ever?

Possibly the worst movie I've ever seen: The Book of Mormon Movie. I didn't pay to rent it, don't worry. We got it as a joke, maybe to watch the first five minutes, but it really pulled us in, it was so bad. Why did Nephi's brothers keep trying to kill him even after God stopped them like 3 or 4 times? Isn't it dangerous to have a group of people that are supposed to reproduce in the promise land consist of just two different families? It makes for a shallow gene pool. I also like that this bronze book has never been seen by anyone outside of Joseph Smith. If it is such a great book, and it was written by the first humans to set foot in America, why don't they proudly display it? And this gold compass sent from God, where is that?

How naive are Mormons? I can't wait to see the second part, so I can see white Jesus walking through Utah.

There were so many funny moments in this film, like when God commands Nephi to smite Laban. Yeah, a real loving God those Mormons have. I also liked the forced conversions, and covenants made under the threat of death, real classy. Check out this gem:

Zoram: Do I have a choice?
Nephi: Yes, my friend, there is always a choice. You can covenant with me and become a free man or die here and now.

I loved how bad of an actor Zoram was, I guess he was a producer or something. His idea of acting is standing still for a while, and then saying, "wait here."

I was always waiting for Lehi to say to his wife, "the Lord spoke to me and commands that you make me a sandwich."

Rent this one if you can, or see if you get some Morms to buy you a copy.